Are you REALLY living?

Are you REALLY living?

Often our schedules get so full that we find ourselves drowning from stress. Why? Because while we are doing everything imaginable, we often forget the most important necessity: Living. This is exactly where I frequently find myself.

Maybe you are trying to be that perfect parent or spouse, that awesome girlfriend, great co-worker and just all around fantastic friend. But it’s completely falling apart from all the stress. It’s time to slam on the brakes, and take some time to breathe.

Really stop and think about what you enjoy, who really matters to you, and if you matter to them. (I could make a whole post on people who just waste your time.) Are you taking time for the things and the people that matter, or is all your time being filled up with life’s unending clutter and people taking advantage of you?

Frequently, we get so busy with all the extras which we feel pressured to do, that we forget to do, or are unable to do, what matters most to us. The things that truly make us feel happy and fulfilled. Making matters worse is the fact that we also re-enforce and pass-on this cycle to our children.

I have often wondered what went wrong with the relationships that mattered to me, when I was trying so hard to perfect them. My problem, I realized, was complicating things unnecessarily by trying in all the wrong areas. I was trying to please everyone and ended up only burning myself out, all the while continuing to feel like crud. Unless we cut loose from all the pointless distractions, baggage and purposeless relationships, life won’t get better. Real joy and fulfillment is found in the things that make life real and ground us. It’s not found in ALL THE EXTRAS we as a society tend to chase till we drop over dead.

Things like that first kiss, the first “I love you”, your baby’s first steps, and even cleaning off those tiny fingers —sticky from sneaking into your cookie batter. Holding hands, going to the park, and coloring with that mini (or not so mini) special person in your life. Stopping to smell that rose on the edge of the sidewalk, calling your parents for a catch-up chat, or spending a whole hour just talking and really connecting with your significant other. Stop and think—when was the last time you paused to stop, take real life in, and savor it?

No matter how long you wait—it won’t change— unless you yourself make that change. So stand back, breathe, de-clutter and prioritize. Instead of wearing yourself out, do what really matters. Do you really need to miss seeing junior’s game? Simply because you let your boss talk you into overtime, so you can get that rug which you will no doubt hate in a week. Are you always running here and there for endless events, and coming home to a TV dinner or take out when you really love to cook? Or that that book club you felt pressured to join but dislike all of the selected books, when you would rather be home, snuggled up on the couch with your significant other or with a book of your own choosing? Oftentimes, I have found when we focus on what really matters in our lives everything else tends to sorts itself out. So trade all of life’s clutter in for what makes you truly happy, and real living will inevitably ensue.

Life happens and time passes, but you get to choose: who, when, where, and how. Don’t let life wear you out, while society and other people dictate what’s supposed to make you happy.

Just keep clucking,

-The Homesteading Hen.